Disney Princess Analyzation

8 August 2016

Although numerous celebrities have tried to compete, there is no denying that the only women that have remained every girl’s role model since the days of light-up sneakers are the Disney princesses. They have shiny, quaffed hair, elegant ball gowns, and unnaturally perfect smiles without awkward middle school head-gear (it glimmered in its own way…). So, how can it be that five animated women came to dominate every single, squishy girl soul from the ages zero to one hundred? Deception.

Of course you never noticed when you were little because you were too focused on coloring inside the lines, but the Disney Princesses we grew up on, the REAL Disney princesses, are just the opposite of role models for women in society today. Bippity- Boppity- Blasphemy Poor Cinderella created every single feaux blonde in the school roaming the halls for her “prince charming”. Guess what? A boy who has a foot fetish is most likely not your type… Since when has judging a person on their outer appearance every lead to a happy ever after?

Disney Princess Analyzation Essay Example

After one little glance, Cinderella decides she loves Prince Charming (he must use Axe hair products), and Prince Charming decides he loves Cinderella (seriously? I feel like I’m watching “The Bachelor”…). After years of being knee deep in crud and talking to vermin, Cinderella loses her beautiful ball gown and pristine carriage to marry her prince. In essence, do your chores, get yourself a stud, and aspire to do absolutely nothing… “Tricks as Old as Time, Song as Old as Rhyme” Belle has beauty and intellect, making her the most dangerous of all princesses.

At the surface, it would seem that Belle would be every mother’s glory child because she values education and is very family oriented. Belle is locked in a tower because her father was lost in the woods (ladies and gentleman, the only man in the world without a Smartphone…) and begins to fall in love with a beast. At the end of this “fairy tale” Belle changes the physical features of the beast with “love” and they live happily ever after. Belle created the “nagging wife” and lead girls to believe that they could change a man. Part of your… Wonder Bra? Thanks to Ariel, Bras are now a substitute for a shirt.

Besides influencing nudist societies, Ariel was the spokeswoman (no pun intended) for airheaded women. Ariel falls in love with Prince Phillip and trades in her beautiful voice for legs (and this, my friends, is when physical attributes became more important than talent). Somehow, Prince Phillip falls in love with Ariel and they get married, even though she has not said a single syllable to him. Ariel teaches young women not to have opinions. As long as you are pretty, or willing to pay the price of extreme plastic surgery, you will live your happily ever after!

Wake up, Sleeping Beauty! Sadly, most girls wouldn’t realize that Aurora is Sleeping Beauty! Her name should just be enough! When a man calls you beautiful every now and then, it’s endearing, but when he calls you nothing but “beautiful” it’s because he doesn’t know your name (or he is genuinely afraid of mixing it up with the other women’s names…. ). Sleeping Beauty is just a good way to call someone a lazy butt. Aurora is the reason that women sleep 16 plus hours to get their “beauty sleep” (hunny, that much sleep is doing just the opposite).

Princess Aurora is the epiphany of your best friend whose boyfriend lives in Jamanji working as a doctor that heals sick fairies and models part time ( OH YEAH!! He doesn’t exist…). She spends all of her time daydreaming for things that she wants in life instead of actually working to get them. Men don’t just fall out of the sky and land in your woods, Aurora; time to stop talking to squirrels and start talking to studs. The Side-effects of Poison Apples Unless you are the kind of girl that can win a lottery with one ticket, Snow White is not a safe route for a role model.

Simply said, she is the luckiest son-of-a-gun that can survive taking candy from a Stranger (if there was a van, she would have jumped into it too). Snow White taught young girls to be naive and to just assume that society is always good (how’s that for a little burst of sunshine? ). She also teaches that you can only make friends by doing all of their chores for them and that, when you really get yourself into a pickle, you need a man to make it all better. And the Clock Strikes Midnight What the heck was Disney thinking?

It’s a good thing we have women like Brittney Spears and Miley Cyrus that we can look up to ( oh yeah, we don’t! ). The world of the perfect, subservient woman has been shattered and Disney has started to make reparations for a lifetime of misconceptions. New Disney Princesses, such as Merida and Tatiana, exemplify strong, fierce women with laudable integrity. While the original Disney princesses may not be the best to take notes on, it’s like watching Lindsey Lohan get yet another DUI: you know it’s bad, but there is no denying it is entertaining.

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