My one ethical dilemma that I …
My one ethical dilemma that I face daily is working the parents of the children I care for within my classroom.
With being child care provider there are many challenging days. We plan our days to go smoothly but that never really happens. From a child not sleeping well at night to another child that is frustrated that bites. As care givers we have to wear many hats all day long from problem solving to being creative to keep the children in focus. Most of the day we wear the Red Hat “What do you feel? What do you sense? What hunches or intuition do you have? The red hat is all about emotions, gut reactions, intuitions. What bubbles up? It is the empathy hat—where we focus on what others feel. When we wear the red hat, we should avoid evaluating, criticizing, or even commenting on the emotions that are expressed.
“By asking the children to express their feeling and letting your classmate know you don’t like that or that hurts. This insures that the child is expressing their feelings and using their words if the child isn’t verbal we teach them the sign language for STOP or BUSY this helps them to communicate. We need to help the children to learn words or sign language to take place of actions. This helps the children to communicate to the other children in the classroom. Then at the end of the day you have to deal with the parent and explain to them why their child had got bit, that makes you put on a different hat, this would involve of the blue hat thinking. “We put on the blue hat to think about how to think about the problem at hand. It is best not to skip around aimlessly.
A plan helps assure that we touch all the bases. It is a way of consciously taking charge of the process so that our subconscious reflexes do not pull us around aimlessly.” I always let the parents know about what happen before their child got bitten. For example Hazel walked over and tried to take way Elizabeth’s doll and Elizabeth told Hazel no no no. But Hazel pulled the doll out of Elizabeth’s hands. This made Elizabeth extremely frustrated and she bite Hazel on the arm. Coming up with an action plan that meets the best for the children in your care.
I always let the parents know this is a normal behavior for a one to two year old. Also have resources for the parents about biting for the biter and the one getting bit. This helps the parents understood more about why it’s happening. Two of by favorite resources are Zero-Three Toddlers, How to Help Your Child Stop Biting flyer and Biting and What to do when your Toddlers bite. By having this information ready for the parents and showing them different reasons why a child bites it helps them to understand how their child is thinking. Here are some examples of why children bite lack of language, over whelmed, over tired, teething, oral stimulation, personal space, moving, parent being absent and even a new baby at home. There are also some books that I suggest about biting that helps the child understand about biting.
No Biting by Karen Katz and Teeth Are Not For Biting by Elizabeth Verdick. The best knowledge is making sure the parents have the right resource material on why Toddlers Bite. Ensuring the parents that it takes teamwork to stop the biting.If the biting continues the best action plan is to have a sat down meeting with the parents to talk about different things that are going on in that child’s life from childcare to home. This will help develop a plan. Last week I had a meeting with one of the girl’s parents in my room. She had been getting bitten a lot lately .
We knew she had a new sibling at home, by talking with her parents we realize that she was sneaking attention. She had been taking toys and other items from other children to get attention on her, which resulted with her getting bitten several times over several days. By asking questions on how much time they were spending just on the girl. They said they do everything with the new baby and the girl. We subject that maybe one night of week it good just be her night with one of the parents or just an extra book at bedtime with the other parent. They said they never thought of it that way. But this week she is respecting her classmate’s space and listening to their words a little better.
This means that she’s not getting bit at the present time, which makes Mom and Dad happier. The child that was doing the biting she was using her words. She would tell her classmates NO, NO, No Busy, and then she would bite them on the arm when they tried to take her toy away. Her mother was afraid of her child being labeled as a “biter”. As caregivers we gave her family the same information as the other family. Which help them to understand why children bite? This child’s mother teaches in the public schools and was open to all the information we gave her. They have been working with her at home also with her big brother helping to create ways for her to use her words more often to express herself with language.
She has also been telling the other children” NO That Mine” which is awesome that she’s using her words more and more every day. “They are usually experts in their field and respected for their abilities that they obtained either through educational learning and training or through practice.” With this helps us to be expert caregivers with years of experience we were able to help these parents on some different choices they were doing at home and for their children best interest. Caregivers and parents identify what would causes the biting it becomes easier to try to help the child understand that biting is not okay. But at the age one or two biting is also a normal behavior in children. By having the open communication with our families this ensures that we can resolve problems when they occur. If we had not worked together as caregivers” The professional is faced not only with the challenge of subordinating their interests to those of their clients but of honoring the profession’s responsibilities to society at large.
” We would never have the opportunity to give the parents the support they need in this situation. It’s never easy leaving your child with someone while you have to go to work, but if you have a good relationship with the caregivers that care for your children it makes it easier. We have an open door policy at our center the caregivers are there for the children but also for the parents. I always tell my parents don’t ever be afraid to ask us for help with any questions about their child or even if they might need help themselves. I have worked on the military base for the last three years serving civilian and military families. Which I take a lot of pride in being able to help our military families “Military organizations are highly structured command and control entitie” With the military we have parents that have been deployed or have been sent to tech school leaving the other parent to take care of the children. Just with things changes can sent a toddler into a biting pattern.
As caregivers we support all of our parents. As like children we have our good days and our bad days the children pick up on the feelings from their parents. Just make sure you keep your parents inform of what going on with their child while they are in your care. 1. Explain the child day2. Ask if they are concern about anything that has happen during the day3. Always give positive with the negative if something has happen or have a notebook to pass-along with child day notes in it.
4. Let them know you support the whole family. 5. Give them resources on issues that arise within the day (biting)I have also attached the flyer that we use within our classroom for resources for biting.