mylo xyloto by Coldplay

9 September 2019

Dear Coldplay,
What have you done to yourself? When I first heard your new album not only was I mildly disturbed by the lack in emotions but I had a strange sensation almost like Lennon and George just turned over in their graves. I truly think the apocalypse has started, and Coldplay you are the cause. You were once a mild alternative rock band but now you sunk so low you’re in hell, also known as pop music.
Chris Martin, what on earth have you done? You started so strong and made people love you naturally. Your break through single, Yellow, was natural and amazing. A Rush of Blood to Your Head is a spectacular album that made me listen to it until my CD player broke. But now, in the new music era you evolved into something so grotesque and disgraceful, you’re P.O.P. You’re now just another auto tuned annoying voice that isn’t real.

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And my dear Coldplay what the heck is Rihanna doing on this album!?! She sings -no scratch that- screams the same not repeatedly throughout Princess of China. Which is supposedly “full of deep and real emotions” according to Rolling Stones Magazine. Ya, right. That was as far as it can be from emotional, it was fake. And Rihanna has absolutely no right on a Coldplay album and is an insult to fans everywhere.
Now, dear readers, send back the tee shirts and trade them in for Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s. They are not auto tuned and stay true to their alternative rock roots. Goodbye to my August Coldplay concert tickets, hello Broadripple is burning and As tall as cliffs by Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s.

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