Philosophy of Romantic Love Essay Sample

9 September 2017

What is “romantic love” ? Is it a feeling? Have you of all time felt a hopeless. irrational love for person. and so instantly repenting this determination. Is it a determination? Is romantic love something people think through? There are those who believe that rational idea is necessary in order for romantic love to be. I agree that rational is a big constituent every bit far as why a individual has strong feelings toward another. However. what is non clear is the definition of romantic love and who it is reserved for.

Coming up with a definition for love may be the most of import measure. and should be the first. in trying to come up with a qualitative definition for what romantic love is. If a individual were to pick up a lexicon. they will most likely find a definition for romantic love depicting it as a enjoyable feeling associated with love. Then. if you look at the definition of love. it is described as a personal tie with person or something based on tenderness and fondness. either out of affinity. esteem or sexual attractive force. However. it is tough to depict the two footings together. Can a individual so have romantic love toward person of the same sex? The definition is missing when depicting who or what love is for. I might love a lamp or have a fetish for women’s intimate apparel. Who can confute my romantic feelings for lacing underclothes? I surely love my best friends. and have esteem for them.

Therefore. harmonizing to the definition. I have a romantic love connexion with these people. I don’t disagree with that. I believe. unconsciously. I choose my friends based on strong evolutionary features. Some that have failings. I have noticed a non-attraction type feeling toward them. The 1s who have stronger features. I have more love for. However. I do apologize when I’m measure uping my friendly relationships with others. Those that make me happiest based on our chemical science and similar involvements. I tend to hang out with more frequently. and have more love for. Most people. even when holding grounds to detest their household members. will most probably choose to salvage their life over a aliens in a dangerous state of affairs. I think there are biological. instinctual constituents to love that regulate our behaviour. but I’m non stating love is strictly biological. Though we will be inclined to do opinions based on our inherent aptitudes. a rational pick for a spouse is a better manner of accomplishing a stronger. “romantic love” connexion by constructing a foundation and internalising durable outlook to develop a long-run relationship.

First. let’s consider “love at first sight” . This is a common phrase to depict an initial yearning for another individual. What is that all about? A individual sees person on the street they are strongly attracted to. without run intoing them. they become enamored really rapidly. holding this demand to somehow strike up a conversation with them. How can love them. if they don’t know anything deep about that individual? These impressions are based on ocular cues. such as physical features. like a beautiful face or organic structure linguistic communication. In footings of men’s attractive force to females. the adult females may hold a bosomy organic structure. Upon farther review. if the individual has societal features that appeal to us. like personal appeal. a capturing smiling. attitude. etc. so our “love” gets stronger for them if there is chemistry present. Chemistry is far more of import than the kingdom of rational qualifiers a individual believes their possible mate should hold. Chemistry is like an evolutionary filter. There are degrees of attractive force based on physical. societal features that are appealing to us in the minute. The finer the individual is in kernel. the farther they pass through the evolutionary filter.

However. the demand to reproduce doesn’t ever wait for the absolute perfect mate. Sometimes. the clip is merely right. When a female is ovulating. she becomes less finical ; her field of vision widens in footings of males she will accept. During ovulation. chests swell up. the organic structure releases chemicals. some doing the tegument to look healthier in order to appeal to the evolutionary push and pull inherent aptitudes of work forces. However. outside of the demand to reproduce. the pick for a spouse is based on more rational guidelines. If we chose spouses based merely on strengths of their evolutionary features. so many people who were bald. blind or corpulent would be without spouses. We don’t see that go oning. To be just. this is largely due to breakthroughs in engineering and the development of cultural norms. Regardless. the ability to apologize is of import in taking a mate. non merely for felicity and endurance. but to at least have an effort at reproduction. This is particularly true in relationships where reproduction is non even possible. In homosexual dealingss. reproduction is non the focal point of attractive force. Their internal standards for a relationship-partner varies greatly. However. that is non to state they don’t have a biological push/pull to reproduce. There are many cheery twosomes who want kids. However. much more idea is put into sing a relationship-partner alternatively of a sexual spouse.

The job with romantic love is that it normally refers to this initial response toward attractive force to another individual. We may desire them at first. but this type of infatuation is limited. Romantic love of this type is fliting. After a few months to a few old ages. people’s firing desire for each other seems to taper off out. After that. what is left? Merely rational idea will maintain a twosome together. In our category reading. Halwani has a rational standard for romantic love. and how it plays out over clip. In it. he suggest that love is strong in footings of physical desirableness and infatuation. but as clip goes by. that portion of love goes off.

However. emotional strength and dependance on a specific individual will turn. He believes this is how romantic love is a changeless province of love. which is something that changes over clip. but merely stays changeless through the rationalisation of the footings in the relationship. He believes that long-lasting. romantic love can merely be found between two people. because it is based on trust. If a individual has multiple spouses. how will they experience confident that they can trust on their spouse to lodge with them throughout life? Halwani suggests that this is why romantic love pushes people toward matrimony ; it is a durable bond between two people. There is one primary receiver of the energy and fondness received by their important other.

So. these fugitive feelings of infatuation and evolutionary desires are non what should be considered as “romantic love” . The changeless province of dependance and fondness toward a spouse is what will normally stand the trial of clip. This takes sex right out of the image in specifying romantic love. If sex were a characteristic of romantic love. wouldn’t married twosomes want sex throughout the life-time?


Halwani. R. ( 2010 ) . Doctrine of Love. Sexual activity and Marriage: An Introduction. New York. New york: Routledge.

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