What has happened to Lulu
What Has Happened to Lulu? Louise Middleton, or Lulu, as she was fondly called by her mother, had been sitting on the hill for over forty minutes now. She bit her lip and found herself glancing around every time she heard a noise.
Her fingers twitched and her heart was racing. Her mouth had turned dry but she forced herself to swallow. Suddenly, a shadow appeared on the ground in the distance. It began advancing towards her, growing longer and longer. Her heart pounded as she sat frozen, staring into the glaring light of the sun.It masked the owner of the shadow, though she had a sick feeling in the it of her stomach that she knew exactly who It was. She could hear footsteps now.
Footsteps of the shadow. A tall slender silhouette was advancing towards her. Clutched tightly in their hand was a screwed up piece of paper. “Why had you never mentioned this before? You should have told me. I could have done something. I could have been there. I was so scared.
I thought you were dead till I found this. Lu, If I knew, I would have changed It all. ” All through her mothers painful words Lulu had sat and stared.She fought back the tears and stared through her as though she weren’t there. She listened intently to the tone of her mother’s voice and pretended not to care. Of course however, she did. She wanted to Jump up and hug her mother.
She wanted to tell her everything that had been building up inside her over the years; the pain, the anger… The truth. She wanted her mother to comfort her as she once did when Louise was a child. She wanted her mother to tell her It will all be alright. But she knew It wouldn’t be alright.
She wasn’t a child anymore. Her mother of course, had always been oblivious.Louise had learned how to cover it all up. How to pretend everything was fine. She had spared her mother the heartache of the truth for so long now. The truth she thought, that would never be uncovered. The day she left was the same as any other.
Louise and her younger brother Ryan were being taken to school by her step dad Mark. They had to rush because Louise would take forever getting ready. This however was just an excuse. Just another lie to cover up the terrible truth. She would do anything to put off getting in the car. Ryan was dropped off first, at his primary school.Louse’s was at high school – another half our away.
Ryan slammed the car door, as small boys do, and waved goodbye excitedly to his big sister – unknowing that was the last she’d ever see of her. Louise faked a smile, but her face felt as he ran to join his friends in the playground. They pulled out and drove off. Her heart dropped as she knew only too well what was about to come. “l hope you’re not thinking of going anywhere tonight? ” “Because I’ve already told your mother you’d help her with the food. ” “But I promised..
. ” “Yes, and I’ve told your mother you’ve promised her. “But I didn’t! I’m not standing round the kitchen all night, arranging sandwiches when all my mates are at the gig! ” The car screeched too halt at a bus stop. “Don’t you dare talk to me like that! Get out of the car. GET OUT! You can walk to school. ” “It’s miles away, and it’s raining! You can’t do that! ” “I can. And I will.
” Louise did not move. She fixated her eyes on him. He got out, opened her door and began to drag her, pulling at her arms. HE screamed, hurling abuse at her, still she did not budge. He demanded her to get out of the car. This was the final warning.He said he’d force her out.
His hand darted towards her face. Half slap, half punch. It knocked her cheek bone. There was a moment that they were both still and silent. Then their eyes met and as just suddenly as it happened, the stillness was broken again. Louise moved faster than ever before, undoing her settable, pushing past Mark and diving out of the car, falling over her feet in the rush. The tears poured camouflaged by the rain.
She adrenal look back. Mark watched her hurry off until she was Just out of soothe. Then he got back in his car and went off to work as if nothing happened.Dear Diary. I guess I can’t call this a diary entry, as it wont be entered into a diary. It’s really more like a letter I suppose. A letter to someone that finds it years later, hoping to uncover the truth.
Mum, I write this to you. I shall keep it in the drawer by my bed. We never got on really, Mark and me. You couldn’t see it mum. You were too wrapped up Mum. You were blind. Blind in love I guess.
He had never hit me before, I’ll give him that. But the day I left. In a way, I’m glad he did. It gave me the power to finally stand up for myself. To do what I had to. To mum.My face was bleeding.
He threw me out of the car. He shouted, calling me all sorts of names. “You’re worthless” He said. “Remember, last night? He said that if I put another foot wrong, I wouldn’t be staying in his house any longer. “His house” It’s not his. I’ve lived there all my life. Fifteen years that is.
Before all this. Before you and dad. Before… Him. And has he ever hit you mum? Do you fear him too? Is that why you nod at every word he says.
Is that why he makes the rules? Is that why you stick to them? Does he threaten you when you’re alone, like he does me?I’m not failing because I’m mixing with the wrong people mum. I’m failing because if him. Don’t you see? I love you mum. That’s why it’s so hard. Be strong. I’ll be fine. I didn’t go to school today.
I came home, knowing nobody was in. I’ve packed some food mum, and spare clothes and the money I was saving. Saving for a rainy day. It rained all day yesterday. Ironic really. Isn’t it? It was the same routine every day. I was tormented every morning in the car Journey between mine and Ryan’s school, then every night before you came home bringing Ryan from the after school club.
The trouble was that he was the perfect gentleman when other people were there. Ryan even called him dad. That disgusted me. It always sent shivers up my spine. He’s not our dad, never will be. A ‘dad’ like him doesn’t deserve to be one. I’m sure he loves Ryan.
At least he pretends to. But he never had the time for me. Do you know, I’ve spent this all locked up for so long because I didn’t want to hurt you. At least that’s what I told myself. You would never believe me. I tried to tell you. You said it was nonsense.
Are you scared of him too mum? I’ve tried, for so long now, to keep it together. But now I’m finally free.